Hi Souza. Even though I'm new to posting on this forum, I have been reading here for a LONG TIME, and I have always appreciated that this was a public forum, and it is BY FAR the best I have found about the hoax. The credit for that belongs to you and Bec. Thank you for all your hard work. I have refrained from posting lately because of the negativity, but I also realize that we can never know what another person is going through 'behind the scenes'. I'm sure that most here appreciate all the work that goes into this place and would not want to see it close down, or to see you leave. Please reconsider and I wish you all the best!<br /> :beerchug:
Oh dear.<br /><br />This is not good.<br /><br />We need to pull together and remember that none of us are the enemy, least of all Souza. She made this lovely place for all of us and put her own efforts into creating and maintaining it. I know a lot of people post their appreciation for that, and do so frequently, but it's so easy to gloss over the positive and be hurt deeply by the negative, especially when it comes from people we respect and care about.<br /><br />I don't know how to fix any of this. I guess we are all dirty, nasty, deeply flawed human beings driven by self-justification. Myself included, of course. Not feeling very good about anything right now and feeling deeply guilty of something I can't put my finger on.
I feel helpless in this, now.<br /><br />All I can do is share what I have learned at another place in this world that I frequent as often as this forum.<br />It is my job in a huge company which is far from being perfect. <br /><br />There are some rules in this company:<br />- don't talk about each other but with each other<br />- respect your colleague and superior<br />- think positively about your colleague and superior<br />- if you have questions, ask<br />- if you have trouble, talk<br />- if you have a personal issue, talk<br />- open door policy = when there is a need, come in and I'll listen<br />- errors are allowed - no blame, guilt or discipline - as long as they go corrected<br />- we help each other<br />- we stand in for each other and row the boat together<br />- if some are weaker, we help them up<br />- nobody will be discredited for an error<br />- nobody will be discredited for his person, gender, hair color, belief, race, family, origin, sexual orientation, being single or being married, having brown shoes on, being ill or any other aspect<br />- we are here because we want to<br />- we are here for a positive development of the whole company.<br /><br />Whatever we produce while working together is a lot of talking, documents, processes, individual habits and capacities of problem solving etc.<br /><br />Many times I fell into the trap of reading a different meaning in an email than it was supposed to transport.<br />Many times I fell into the trap of hearing a different meaning in words than were supposed to be heard.<br /><br />The ONLY TWO solutions to prevent from any possible trouble are:<br /> 1) think positive of the person<br /> 2) talk with that person face to face and clear it up.<br /><br />We tend to think others might mean "bad" when in fact they don't. <br />We tend to think we got it all right and have the one right conclusion at hand. <br /><br />This however is not the case in 99.9% of human interpretations. <br />Both mechanisms have to do with individual insecurity and lack of faith.<br /><br />My experience in this company is:<br />- everybody wants to be needed<br />- everybody wants to be kept in mind<br />- everybody wants to be respected<br />- everybody wants to be loved<br />- everybody wants to contribute positively.<br /><br />I learned to always remember to first think positively of my vis-à-vis, first presume positive intentions and first remember that I might be 100% wrong. This not only makes life a lot easier for the persons around me and for myself but brings a bunch of light and positive experiences into others' and my days.<br /> <br />I know we mean well, everybody. <br />We have to cross language, age, gender, cultural, historical and more barriers to be here as a family. <br />We've done that pretty amazingly.<br />Please, can we stop the negativity and leave it behind us?<br /><br />
Great post, Grace. I really appreciate you taking the time to compose it. They are excellent guidelines for all experiences in life.<br /><br />It is overwhelming sometimes. It is so much easier said then done, but we have to start somewhere.<br /><br />I hope this to be the case: This too shall pass.<br /><br />These words are running through my head: Keep calm n carry on.
I don't post much but I am deeply grateful to to you all and this forum. I see it like a light in the dark. Please, don't turn off the light. United we can find the strenght to go through whatever will happen.<br />Souza, I wish you all the best and I hope you'll come back soon
Thank you Souza, Bec and new mods for keeping after this wonderful place! People do seem more nervous nowadays, but maybe it is caused by approaching time, every day we are closer to december, to a deadline for some of us. I hope from the bottom of my heart that we will be able to stay positive and friendly here. After all, we ARE friends!<br /> :bearhug:
Peace is a universal feeling (energy) that begins in our hearts and that eventually manifests itself in external events. This means that we cannot contribute to the peace without having found our internal peace.<br />If we want to achieve peace, the most powerful tool we have is our intention ... our intention makes miracles (literally). If each of us we can focus our intention on achieving peace, the problems will be solved easily. Each of us must do its part, In a small society as the family, where there is love among its members, you can lose the peace. There is no doubt that peace is something very fragile so you have to work patiently every day to win her over, and finally, let us be cautious when we talk about other people, because without knowing we can reach out to hurting others.
Oh dear.<br /><br />This is not good.<br /><br />We need to pull together and remember that none of us are the enemy, least of all Souza. She made this lovely place for all of us and put her own efforts into creating and maintaining it. I know a lot of people post their appreciation for that, and do so frequently, but it's so easy to gloss over the positive and be hurt deeply by the negative, especially when it comes from people we respect and care about.<br /><br />I don't know how to fix any of this. I guess we are all dirty, nasty, deeply flawed human beings driven by self-justification. Myself included, of course. Not feeling very good about anything right now and feeling deeply guilty of something I can't put my finger on.
<br />I feel like my heart is going to break...<br /><br />Michael said he did all his music, dance, and creative output all for one reason--to be loved!! He also has rhinoceros skin, and NEVER gives up! He said he got his warrior spirit from his dad, Joe.<br /><br />Please everyone, let's follow in his footsteps, and do this for L.O.V.E., no matter what it seems someone else might be thinking negatively. We have to move forward. In the words of the 3 Musketeers, "All for One, and One for all"! We have a goal to reach! MJ asked us, "Will you be there? Will you still care?" I love you all so much, and it hurts to see you hurting.<br /><br />We are all going to have to lift Souza's arms, like his helpers lifted Moses' arms during one battle. Or we're doing down baby... :screaming-7365:<br /><br />Grace<br />
This however is not the case in 99.9% of human interpretations. <br />Both mechanisms have to do with individual insecurity and lack of faith.<br /><br />My experience in this company is:<br />- everybody wants to be needed<br />- everybody wants to be kept in mind<br />- everybody wants to be respected<br />- everybody wants to be loved<br />- everybody wants to contribute positively.
<br /><br />MaryK, what a wonderful, perceptive and professional description of forum protocol.
I don't know even know what to say...I left this morning feeling better about things on the board and now I just don't know what I'm feeling. It's a mixed bag...too mixed up. I find it very difficult to engage in the 'hoax' threads, including TS' and Front's threads (which are my favorite) when I see people not getting along...especially over possible misunderstandings. It's even more saddening (to put it mildly) when it's happening between long-time members who we've come to KNOW are great people.<br /><br />For whatever reason, a lot of us (myself included) are hyper-sensitive lately and it seems to be causing us to misinterpret/misread each other (I misinterpreted one of bec's posts last week...but thankfully, she helped clear it up for me). It's also causing us to FORGET everything we have learned about each other along the way...and we DO know a lot about each other after being here together for so long. We are a GREAT group guys! We have so many different personalities on the board and even though we may not always agree on everything, we should be at the point where we at least give someone the benefit of the doubt...and if that still doesn't clear it up, then we should be able to approach another fully confident in knowing that they TOO will give you the benefit of the doubt. Given how great the personalities are here....I'm sure that most issues could be resolved between those having the 'issue'...we're all mature adults here. And if every attempt made to reconcile the issue has not been successful, then we should respect the other members of the board enough to just let it go.<br /><br />I know it's easier said than done....anything worthwhile is, especially when dealing with emotions and relationships. But we HAVE GOT to pull ourselves together and take responsibility for our own words, actions, and misunderstandings....and FIGHT to keep the family together, not against each other.<br /><br />I also know that it's difficult to see a silver lining in any trying time. But what has stood out most for me during the past week or so....in seeing members arguing amongst themselves, in seeing all of us being accused of being anti-Semitic, in misunderstanding one of bec's posts and feeling hurt by it, in seeing other members' feelings being hurt by something someone said (also due to misunderstandings)....what ALL that has made me realize is that we DO care about each other and we want those we care about to care about us too. ...no matter how much we try to deny it to ourselves or each other.<br /><br />If you think about it, that's a pretty great silver lining...and I hope and pray that it will get us through this tough time.<br /><br />With L.O.V.E. always.<br /><br />P.S. @Mary and Grace...thanks for your great posts.
I am feeling like back in those few days after June 25th when I thought Mike was dead. Something between emptiness and despair :icon_pale:.<br />I am not really sure how we got to this point. What happened? Who started it? When exactly did it start? Why Front left?<br />What the hell is going on??
Peace is a universal feeling (energy) that begins in our hearts and that eventually manifests itself in external events. This means that we cannot contribute to the peace without having found our internal peace.<br />If we want to achieve peace, the most powerful tool we have is our intention ... our intention makes miracles (literally). If each of us we can focus our intention on achieving peace, the problems will be solved easily. Each of us must do its part, In a small society as the family, where there is love among its members, you can lose the peace. There is no doubt that peace is something very fragile so you have to work patiently every day to win her over, and finally, let us be cautious when we talk about other people, because without knowing we can reach out to hurting others.
<br /><br />There is enough bad stuff that happens in the world everyday, we don't need it in here. Peace is possible even with conflicting personalities, we just need to want it enough. This forum is a place to learn and love.<br />
Oooops, just found out that @Admin is @Souza.<br /><br />Considering all the s*it Souza has taken during the years of the hoax forum, her post soon or later was going to happen.<br /><br />As I see it, she has been stalked and harassed for a very long time outside this forum, so it should not be easy to have the same feeling inside the forum, either by trolls or members.<br /><br />Souza, you know you are a tuff cookie, but I would like to tell you and everyone feeling down at times, that the feeling of not being able to cop for any longer is just the sign to have been strong for too long, not a sign of weakness.<br /><br />If you need your break, you just earned it.<br /><br />I am sure I talk for many when I say that we are here, with ups and downs, with better and worst days, with laughs and confrontations, but still HERE WITH YOU in your forum.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />
Closing the forum for a few days is not a good idea... We might miss some important clues! And what if Michael would BAM during those "off-days"? :Pulling_hair:<br /><br />I love you all, guys. Souza, I wish you all the best in your personal life. Stay strong.
There have been a lot of great posts that I agree with, excellent observations.<br /><br />It’s a great decision to have extended the number of global moderators. Excellent choice– love you guys and congratulations on the promotion. :th_bravo:<br /><br />Souza, we cannot thank you enough for all that you do to maintain this forum going. I really hope that you believe these words and do not forget them. I hope the fact there are new mods now will give you the time necessary to have this much needed break. TIME does miracles believe me. You will come back with a fresh mind and appeasement in your heart God willing.<br /><br />It’s really sad that we’re losing members like that. We are a family and each member must know that they are loved and appreciated greatly. We all add something unique. We must stay united. <br /><br />I don’t know what’s going on concerning all these sudden misunderstandings – there has been like a snowball effect of negativity. Maybe the fact Venus will soon come across the Sun has an impact, a little like the full moons? Joke aside-- if I can give a suggestion – it seems that sometimes words are misinterpreted or rather “intentions” – so maybe the use of a smiley can sometimes soften the way a post is received? <br /><br />Example:<br /><br />"I don’t agree with you."<br /><br />"I don’t agree with you. :icon_e_smile:"<br /><br />Maybe a lame suggestion I concede lol, but I'm saying this because what I am seeing is that despite being a “family” we still do not know each other personally so we must still be careful about how we “speak” and come across especially in this form of communication. <br /><br />I love each one of you and let's STAY STRONG FOR MICHAEL.<br /><br />God bless you.<br /><br /> :bearhug:
I don't post here often, but I do read almost everything you guys read,this forum is very important for me.It feels good that u r not alone with believing mj is alive.<br />I Also thinks you Souza have done a very GOOD job here on the forum :smiley_abuv: And I hope u Souza don't ever doubt that.Plz don't take down this forum.<br /><br /><br />And I think it would be a good Idea to have rules like the one Grace posted. to keep this forum for us members in a better mood.<br />Our focus should be the Hoax, that's what we all started here for, 3 years ago. <br /><br />Don't feed the trolls,I bet they like when we argue with eachother. Try not argue in public,keep it in a PM if u can!<br /><br />KEEP THE FAITH;BE STRONG.
Souza, no one can run this board like you do. That’s just a fact, simple and true. As I have said many times, I’ve frequented many, many forums over the last 3 years looking for a place that felt real and where I would be taken seriously and given a voice without feeling foolish or like a misfit. :icon_pale: This Is It! Period. <br /><br />This place is like an extended family inn; a whole lot of people in one house, bumping into each other, with different personalities and at different stages of growth. We are going to get on each other’s nerves from time to time, but in the end, we hug and make up. That’s human and shows maturity and sincere comradery. No one is going to be agreeable 100% of the time. Heads are going to bump and sometimes feelings are going to be hurt. I am no exception to the rule and neither is anyone else. It’s the end result that makes this forum stand out from any other that I’ve seen any where. <br /><br />So as far as you not posting anyore, bummers :computer-losy-smiley: Where would we be without you? Certainly a long way from where we are now. You are like Big Mama, and in a family this size, big mama is needed :LolLolLolLol:<br /><br />Take a break. You certainly deserve one. I’ve taken a few as have many other members. But we came back because it is our familiar and we were welcomed back with hugs and open arms. <br /><br />I am probably one of the oldest members here, retiring in about 3 months :woohoo2: , but I love it here. Please don’t shut it down. I look forward everyday to getting home and reading what people have discovered while I’m at work, or just some of the light hearted responses that make me smile. (Gina for one) :smiley-vault-misc-150: <br /><br />I know you will be the one to make the final decision, but I hope you, Souza will not stop interacting with us and that the forum will stay up even if the activity level goes down. When it is the right time, it will come alive again. Bec, Curls and the new mods (CONGRATULATIONS) can keep this thing on track because we are all grownups. When its house cleaning time, everybody needs to be accountable for and clean up his own mess. I believe that we can and we will. :bearhug:
So as far as you not posting anyore, bummers Where would we be without you? Certainly a long way from where we are now. You are like Big Mama, and in a family this size, big mama is needed
<br /><br />Like the woman in the shoe! :icon_lol:<br /><br /><br /><br />So Souza, I hope you get the message about how much we feel for your situation, and appreciate you. Have a well needed rest!
I cannot believe how events have unfolded today. I wish I could say something to make this sorry situation better but I seem unable to string together any meaningful words. I feel stunned, and in shock that I appear to have been the catalyst that has tipped Souza over the edge that she's been teetering over for some time.<br /><br />Who, if either of us, or neither of us, was right or wrong in our interaction is of no consequence, when both are left feeling hurt and miserable.<br /><br />Please, if any of you are in contact with Souza on a more personal basis than the forum, please watch out for her. I'm worried about her. I don't know what, if any, support she has in her private life.<br /><br />@Souza, if you read this, please let me repeat that it was never my intention for things to escalate to the level they have done. If I misunderstood anything you said, then I apologise. Take the break you need and if that involves closing the forum, then you have my support in that. Please take care of yourself.<br /><br />@everyone else, I'm sorry you had to witness today's ugliness. Take care of yourselves too.
You are like Big Mama, and in a family this size, big mama is needed
<br /><br />@Guys....I love you all.<br /><br />@Big Mama....I/we love you too.<br /><br />@Front....I/we miss you and I/we love you.<br /><br />Blessings
Souza, I 'm sorry that I can not help much in this moment..Unfortunately my english is not good.<br />Above all take care of yourself , you gave a lot in these three years...and for this thanks for always :bearhug:<br /><br />For me, in my experience you are a wonderful admin and I say it sincerely...and I admire you very much.<br /><br />My desire is that the forum does not close, is very important for me , is a fixed point.... :moonwalk_:<br />With L.O.V,E.<br />Love you all, really... :bearhug:<br /><br />Congratulations to new moods !!! :icon_razz:
<br />You are like Big Mama, and in a family this size, big mama is needed<br /><br />Like the woman in the shoe! :icon_lol:
<br /><br />Oh my gosh priceless MJonmind! <br /><br />I think we should really keep Romans 14:13, 19 in mind "Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in the way of a brother or sister."; "Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification."<br /><br />That's just part of it... if you read Romans 14 and Romans 15 it's very enlightening.<br /><br />@Curls Thank you for your message. We live in a world of free will and choices. That is the greatest power we've been given, the power of choice. We each choose how we communicate, how we receive a message, how we react to a message and it's all colored by the things we are going through or have gone through. It is unfortunate how things have ended up however let's learn from it. What I've learned is that in any relationship, it is very very damaging to point a finger at another and say what they could have done better. The best thing to do, for all of us, is see how each of us can grow from this. Curls, how could you have handled things better, reacted better, etc? What can you learn from this? Make the changes you need to make. Souza and whoever else involved should do the same thing. This may not happen now because exhaustion, fatigue, etc can close us to wanting to make any changes! In time though... in time things may change.<br /><br />
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